Candid Moments are…Well, Candid

When my husband and I booked our official wedding photographer, one of our primary instructions was to ensure that they capture spontaneous moments more than formal ones. Since we’re having an intimate affair, we wanted to at least honor our guests by showing how much they enjoyed our wedding through photos of themselves taken during the event. Here are only a few from the many snap shots we personally loved from the collection:

What’s the problem, Mayor? Had trouble putting the garter on Anj’s leg? (above left); College friends in the background cheering “The Lucky Pair” on (bottom left); My mother-in-law having a blast! (right)

The Principal Sponsor and The Parentals. Oh, wait! Blacktieproject’s Mastermind was caught on camera smiling, too! (above); The ladies wanting to get a closer view of “The Lucky Pair” (bottom left); My husband’s rare moment: laughing his heart out. Can you not tell? (bottom right)

My cousin, Sam, still looked lovely in spite of her bewildered reaction (left); Watch out, ladies! Micah took her game up a notch! (middle); Why contain your laughter, Sherry? (right)

The Aunt’s and The Principal Sponsor’s signature laughs (above left); Looks like Ete could not take it anymore (bottom left); Anj and Mayor as “The Lucky Pair” (right)

In the far left is Roan’s aunt who seldom smiles in photos, but was caught laughing with my aunt and her friends during the game about The Couple (above); Anj’s reaction when our wedding coordinator/host explained the mechanics of the singles’ game for the ladies (bottom left); Sherry’s equally shocked reaction on how to “win” the game (bottom right)

Roan and I still find ourselves laughing with these people simply by looking at these photos. We love how these stolen moments prove that our reception program turned out to be genuinely entertaining. It wouldn’t have been possible had our friends refused to willingly participate in the games, albeit humiliating. Looking back, not one guest was caught [on camera] frowning at the party which could be a clear indication that every one of us had fun.

P.S. I hope these photos made your day as much as they did mine!

That Time of Their Lives

Is it just me or coincidence that I have become vulnerable to news on engagement proposals and weddings now that I’m married? I guess 2014 is the prime year for people my age to tie the knot. I may not look like it, but I’m already in my late 20s, guys! Although our wedding is over, I still couldn’t help but look at our photos and read wedding blogs because why not?

Two weeks ago, I attended my college friends’ wedding. What makes it even more special is that they’ve been together since 2005. How does one define a relationship that is only a year short of a decade? One thing is certain: they have been through a lot, and that’s telling something.

An Epiphany

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It has finally happened. It being that one thing I have been praying for has materialized.

Last night, I chanced upon someone who I have not seen nor heard of since that god-awful night exactly three years and nine months ago. I know it was God’s doing, and His timing was perfect. My family and I just finished late dinner, waiting for the bill, when her father walked right into the same restaurant we were in. Of course I still recognized him because it wasn’t the first time since; I chanced upon him twice in different occasions, but I never told anyone about it.

I must confess that when she emerged from the driver’s seat of their SUV, our eyes locked. I saw her mouth my name, and I wasn’t sure what to think of it. Dead air filled our table; everyone appeared to have stopped breathing like I did. Finally, she entered the restaurant, and started to walk towards our table. In that very instant, I wished the ground would swallow me up.

This time she said my name audibly, and I heard it. All of us did. When I turned around to face her, she was smiling. She asked how my Mom was, how my family has been. She noticed how much my brothers have grown.

For a second, I may have tuned out from what she was saying, thinking she looked exactly as I remember her. She extended her hand to congratulate me on my recently concluded wedding. I didn’t ask how she knew; it didn’t matter. She broke away from our handshake, embarrassed by her clammy palms. Some things haven’t changed at all.

While we’re on the subject, I asked her if she’s still in a relationship with her long-time boyfriend. She confirmed, and I’m glad to know. She says they have not talked about marriage yet. Our ‘small talk’ was good while it lasted. Just before she retreats from our table, she says:

Okay naman kami. Okay na kami. Ikaw lang naman eh… (We’re okay. We’re okay now. It’s just you who…)

I thought I was the only one to notice how her face changed as she lets her voice trail off. If it weren’t pain and regret, I don’t know what were. I approached her for the last time as we leave the premises, and asked her to send my regards to the other girls.

It was awkward, but not strained. I think that was a good thing. I can’t say that it was an unfortunate encounter; unexpected was more fitting. Funny how I have prayed for this, but uncertain of the kind of reception I will experience. All this time I thought I will feel slighted when I see them upfront, but instead I was approached differently. I thought she was genuine and sincere. My parents thought so, too. My Dad emphasized the fact that such chance meeting seems inevitable since we all live in the same city.

There are plenty of questions going on in my head right now. I know she cannot speak on behalf of the other girls, but it seems like we’re not so far from closure/possible reconciliation. With that being said, I guess all there’s left to do now is pray, and allow God’s will to prevail.

If anyone of you is reading this right now, know that I wish you well.

Has anyone else experienced something similar to this? What’s your story? Let me know, I’d love to hear yours, too.

An Open Letter To My Brother

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Dear Kevin,

How have you been? I know you’ve been very busy with school nowadays, especially that it’s your last year in college. I take this a good sign knowing you’ve been through a lot in the last couple of weeks. I want to tell you something I’ve been meaning to say since I knew about what happened between you and your [now] ex-girlfriend. I kind of felt betrayed when I found out that I was the last to know, but looking back, I’d say it was the right decision.

Now, let’s cut to the chase. I feel bad that you have experienced your first heartbreak ever, but at the same time, I’m glad you did. Let me explain why. Remember what they used to say about when one door closes, a window opens? That’s true most of the time. You may not admit it, but I knew how devastated you were. Didn’t you know you were the family’s sunshine? How you painstaking share your stories from school is all in a day’s work. Your random singing whether upon waking up, while taking a bath [or even a dump] crack us the hell up. It’s almost magical how you brighten up our day.

Today would have been your second year anniversary as a couple. I knew because you even had your mobile phone number patterned to that date. I know you loved her so much that it came to a point that I had to hit you in the head. No, not literally, but you know what I mean. I had to call your attention because from our point-of-view, what we’re seeing is no longer considered a “healthy relationship”. I don’t know if you’ve realized this now, but you had your world centered in your [now] ex-girlfriend. You were always fidgeting with your mobile phone that talking to you upfront had been an annoying effort. We hardly see nor feel your presence at home because apart from school, you were always out with your girlfriend. Yes, there’s nothing wrong with that, but you’d rather go out with her and her family on a Sunday, too? Seriously? In one of our arguments, I had to emphasize how I managed to decline all invitations from friends especially if these fell on a Sunday because I consider this day our Ultimate Family Day. That’s how I learned to say “no” to friends, and I don’t regret every bit of it.

I have to give it to you, though, that despite my indifference towards your [now] ex-girlfriend, you were never disrespectful of me. I’m sorry that my approach wasn’t always the best one, but I had to do my job as your eldest sister. So where is this leading to? I know it’s difficult. Believe me when I say I do understand how much it hurts because you know I’ve been there. It is okay to hurt, but don’t let heartbreak consume you. Pain makes you stronger. It does, and I’m speaking from personal experience. You may not understand this now, but you will in due time. Most importantly, do not chase people. Work hard, and be you. The right people who belong in your life will come find you and stay. Do your thing.

You are young, and you have a fruitful life ahead of you. Focus on your studies now, and you will reap what you have invested in the near future. You are an amazing person inside and out, and I firmly believe that you will go places with the kind of attitude you have towards your dreams and goals. Know that when all else fails, you have a family to support and accept you. No questions asked.

Let this be a lesson well-learned. Turn this unfortunate event into something more worthy of your time and efforts. There’s no doubt you will meet the next person who would make you fall in love again. I can’t promise to be all open arms with whoever your next girlfriend will be, but I assure you that I will always have your back. After all, that’s what siblings are supposed to do, right? We stand up for each other no matter what. Always know that I love you, and that I am proud of you. Offer your pain, sufferings, and frustrations to God, and He will take care of the rest. You will be fine. I promise.

With love and kisses,
Ate Jae

No Way

Unbelievable.

I haven’t posted anything on my blog for 66 days now. I don’t even remember the last time I read a page or two from the book I was reading.

This is insane.

I patiently wait for three o’clock until I head home. I have been fiddling with the stuff in my purse. I have sprayed alcohol on my hands three times for the last fifteen minutes. I am restless.

Last night, I posted this on Twitter:

Indeed.

I have been really busy the past two months with wedding planning that I can’t even squeeze into doing some things I find relaxing—blogging and reading. The only personal thing I manage to push myself into doing despite the madness of planning a wedding is going to the gym after work hours. I am struggling with managing my time to work on some things because of my day job. As if resignation is the only solution to this. Brushed my thoughts, but not really considering it. Well, not just yet.

I know this is a lame post; there isn’t really worth reading here, but you did. Thank you. I just wanted you to know that I’m still very much alive and kicking. I can’t promise to write a follow-up post soon(er), but I will try.

Laters, alligators.